Brought to you by.

One of the things that has been growing and growing and growing in sports is the sponsoring of different activities, or breakdowns during a game. "This trip to the bullpen is brought to you by Bud Light..." I'm not sure if it's because of the unpopularity of commercials, or just a new way to sell advertising.

I want to sell advertising too. If some pregnant chick can advertise ad space on her belly - I should be able to sell time in my day. I would make an advertising statement out loud when certain things happened during the day.

The Frito's Thursday Morning Itinerary

6:00am - "This morning's wake-up was brought to you by Serta Sleep."
6:01 - "The trip to the snooze button is sponsored by Timex."
6:06 - "The scratch of the crotch is brought to you by Gold Bond Powder."
6:27 - "Irish Spring brings you today's shower"
7:15 - "Clothing selection is brought to you by McDonald's"
8:00 - "When you want to drive - drive Pontiac."
8:36 - "The system start is sponsored by Apple - Think different."
8:39 - "The checking of the email is brought to you by Microsoft - Do something."
9:41 - "Coffee is by Starbucks"

Meetings could be sponsored by 3M and "Separations" (firings) can be sponsored by Trump Ice... Restroom breaks sponsered by the 'Dial' handsoap...

Now, how do I phrase this on eBay?