When the Hell did THAT happen?

Ok...now I'm 30. THIRTY. I think it's supposed to be a big thing. The big three-oh. I say oh well. No biggie on this front. I don't know why. Maybe it's the times. I don't know. I don't feel 30... but I really don't know what 30 is supposed to feel like. I think I made it abundantly clear in my last post that I like my childish side, and that I feel quite young.

So I've thought about what thirty brings me. And the answer is... nothing. Just another year. I started losing my hair a few years ago, so that can't be it. This year I will be married. My goal for marriage was always to be married by the time 30 rolled around. That is the sign of the times. My parents were married much earlier. My brothers were married much earlier. I think the thing that made me feel most old was my younger brother getting married before me. But that passed in a day or so. Thankfully, one of my better (or worse) characteristics is that I just don't care what's going on around me. I'm not sure if that's wrong, but still....

I am happy I didn't get any "Over the Hill" presents. That was one thing I was dreading. It's supposed to be a milestone... Funny, I feel mid-twenties, but I can't really remember my 20th birthday. It feels like time has passed so quickly, but at the same time, 20 seems so long ago. At 20 I was in college, and partying, and going to classes. I majored in things that I don't really use right now (except my business degree, I use that a little). 1995 was an eternity ago. I think the past 3-4 years changed everything.

But, I can't put my finger on the changes. Again, I feel the same, but don't go out as much as I used to... but I never liked going out. I never liked super-social situations. The funny thing about that is that I was extremely social when I was, like, 6. Anyweay, the fact is that I don't need to be social so much. I enjoy being at home and watching movies and television, and talking to my future wife. I have friends... don't get me wrong. My friends are scattered and have kids. I see their kids, and think "no way... not now." I could handle it now, but don't really want to. I want to enjoy my fiance, and have a couple years with just me and her.

So 30 doesn't feel all that much to me. Just another year. It's true that you are as old as you feel, but I don't feel a year. All I feel is life. And I will continue to live it at my own pace.